Wednesday, January 6, 2010

The Top 25 Moments of 2009- List

Happy 2010! This is going to be a great year, possibly, hopefully, I think, maybe, oh crap, dang it, I'm in high school, this year is going to SUCK!

Anyway, now that I've had my emotional moment, I would like to speed up my list a little bit. Instead of listing each moment and giving a long, boring story, I'm going to give the entire list of the best moments of 2009, with short descriptions. Here we go.

25. Fruit Punch Chug- I was at EFY, and chugged a liter of fruit punch during pizza night. It was painful, but victorious.

24. Gargantuan Dinner of Frozen Food- During our 18/24 hour day, we were hungry, so we ate way too much frozen food for comfort. It's our future of obesity being foreshadowed, but delicious.

23. White Wedding- During my St. Joe party with Truett and Dillon, Truett and I had a face off of Rock Band at the Gamestop at the mall to the song "White Wedding- Part 1". It wasn't the best way to plan on getting a girlfriend, but it was fun.

22. Perkins Pie- After the Bob Seger/Lynyrd Skynyrd cover bands, I ate at Perkins with Dad and Jon. And the next day, I had the pie for breakfast. This gives the same result as 24.

21. MMEA Madness- MMEA gave me experience, college information, lots of sweat, S.W.A.G., a headache, nervous stomach, the stomach flu, a desire to punch nerds, more S.W.A.G., and an excuse to not go to Science Olympiad. Victoriously awful/fun.

20. Boys' Day Announcement-That's right. We're getting another boy to the family. Epic win at IHOP.

19. St. Louis Watchtower- Dave Matthews totally made a night filled with heat and lesbians worth it, with his epic epic epic epic performance of "All Along the Watchtower". With a bit of Stairway in the middle.

18. Lowes Hide & Seek- During our 18/24 hour day, Jon and I were running out of ideas, so we played hide and seek at Lowes. I couldn't find him for 20 minutes. Why did I not check Tool World?

17. Robbie's Bringing Sexy Back- Robbie Carder totally made that awful day at Worlds of Fun worth it with winning against the $5 "Guess your month of birth" person, winning a pillow that says "I'm bringing sexy back". Robbie, you made my day.

16. Cloth on Fire- While under the influence of Vicoden after my mouth surgery, the world made the mistake of trusting me near a burner. While I was cooking instant mashed potatoes, I lifted up a cloth, and the following conversation took place:
"Hey Jon, look. It's on fire."
"What are you doing?"
"Look."
"Put it in the sink!"
(I look over and point towards the sink) "That sink?"
"Yes! That sink!"

Dangerous, yet awesome.

15. Nauvoo Jeep Drive- So my parents were in the temple. So my dad just got a jeep. So Jon and I were bored. So we drove around Nauvoo. So we had more time. So we drove to Carthage and back. So it was awesome.

14. Crane Game- During our party in St. Joe, we all went to Wal-Mart. And we saw the crane game. And we had money. So we spent a good hour playing on the crane games. There were 3 machines, 3 men, and large amount of attempts. So why the crap did we not win anything??

13. Gravedigger with Willie Nelson- During the Kansas City Dave Matthews concert, we were 7 rows back from the front, when an old man with a guitar came on and played "Gravedigger" with Dave. Epic. Did I mention that we were 7 rows back?

12. Choir Concert- Aside from doing a decent job on my solo of "Winter Wonderland", the choir concert was filled with jeans, ties, running in the cold, almost stepping on the urine of small children, and more...you had to be there.

11. Our Gallon Challenge- After certain events transpired in the month before, Jon and I wanted to include a gallon challenge in our 18/24 hour day. So we attempted it. 0 minutes in, it seemed possible. 10 minutes in, we were doing good. 20 minutes in, we were slowing down. 25 minutes in, we both were starting to realize why this was called a Challenge. 30 minutes in, we were both moaning for dear life. 40 minutes in, we were slowly forcing ourselves to put more milk into our system, while it rested as a solid in our stomachs. 45 minutes in, I finally gave in and threw up. 50 minutes in, Jon was fearing drinking any more. 55 minutes in, I was screaming at him to give it a go. 58 minutes in, Jon gave it a final go. 59 minutes in, Jon said, "That's all. Good night." He then threw his hour up onto the ground. Bravery is bittersweet.

10. Kid Rides- So there we were, stuck at the St. Joe mall. We needed something to do. So obviously, we went straight to the source of fun. Kid rides. A good $10 was spent that day riding rides that we didn't fit into. It was painful, but funny. I still feel those cramps from the rides that had a maximum age of 8.

9. Dance with Not Single Girl- EFY was supposed to increase my confidence, especially at dances. It does not help when I go up to a girl and ask her to dance, ask her what she likes, only to hear the response, "being madly in love with my boyfriend. You?" Good learning experience. Don't go for wallflowers that are texting during the slow songs.

8. America T-Shirts- Now the symbols of our friendship, Dillon, Truett, and I all got $5 shirts from Sears that has the word "America" on it. Epic. American. Best $5 ever spent. America. Epic. $5. Epic. America.

7. Come Sail Away- Undoubtedly the coolest concert moment of my life, I saw Styx perform "Come Sail Away" live. From the insane keyboardist/singer that stood on his keyboard and danced while singing, to the entire crowd singing every single word, "Come Sail Away" has become the Epic Anthem of all time.

6. Edward Cullen Picture Day- The official milestone that I had lost all shame/embarrasment of anything inside, I believe that the title is fairly self-explanitory. I wore a black collared shirt, popped up the collar, showed off my widow's peak, and had the person in front of me put on eyeliner. The photographer asked, "Are you sure this is how you want to look?", followed by, "Don't worry. I'm a child of the 80s, so I like it." Epic? Yes.

5. USA Pancake- Most likely the mascot of our 18/24 hour day, Jon and I started off our day by trying something we've wanted to try. We made a crap load of pancake batter, and filled the entire frying pan. We put the chocolate chips to spell "USA", and ate this giant pancake. A picture doesn't prove the point. It was huge. Huge. Gargantuan. Epic.

4. Daniel Argyle: The Gallon Challenge- The moment that put the summer in a frenzy of chugging. Truett and I were talking on the second to last day of school about the gallon challenge, when the valiant Daniel Argyle volunteered. He brought milk to school the next day. Unfiltered cow milk. And after Mr. Elbert let school out after his "Don't do anything stupid this summer" speech, we all went into the front sidewalk to watch Daniel chug 2/3 of a gallon of unfiltered cow milk in 3 minutes, before throwing it all up. The stains of his bravery last to this day. He is my hero.

3. Creeps at Wal-Mart- During our St. Joe party, this is something I've always wanted to do. So we did it. Truett, Dillon, and I walked around Wal-Mart with the most random of items that have an awful conclusion, including bleach, rubber gloves, a hatchet, a noodle, and a pack of lima beans. We watched as people attempted to not stare at us, only in vain. We. Are. Awesome.

2. Starting this Blog- That's right. I couldn't think of a better moment than this to fill #2. I considered moving everything else up, but that would be painful. Why is this number 2? I had another post, but seeing as it might be offensive to anybody living in Germany, I thought I'd change it. So this blog has started my career. Not as a writer or a comedian, but as a face model. They'll see my profile picture of Edward cullen and ask themselves, "Why doesn't he show his real face?" Then they'll see my real face. At this point, they say, "My gosh. His face is drop dead gorgeous." The men all want to be my best friend, and the women all want me to make out with them. This is when Miley Cyrus, Sigourney Weaver, Reese Witherspoon, and Catherine Zeta-Jones all have a knife fight. Winner gets me. Ah, the sweetness of face modeling.

1. State Academic Team- This was my one major school activity accomplishment. Having a 1 loss season, our academic team stormed through districts and regionals, only to make it to state. This is our story. It's great and awful, victourious and defeated, wonderful, amazing, and strange all at the same time. A perfect moment for the year.

We got in the car at 4, ready to win. We drove for 3 hours in the small school van. We walked to the building where we would compete. The day was rainy. The person in charge asked if he could take our picture outside. I walked with my team outside. Suddenly, I hear a whack, then a scream. Our coach, Mrs. St. John, was on the ground, crying. She broke her arm. While Coach Gann took her to the hospital, the 5 members there sat around a table, waiting for what to do. We then decided to play anyway. The preliminary rounds were hard, fighting for our lives. Finally, after a major win and two small losses, we checked the scores. We missed the next round. By 30 points. 3 questions. Defeated, we checked on our coach, who would stay in Columbia for the night, and went home. Although we lost, the fact that a team with 4 players (Dillon did spotting work for the other people) were 30 points away from bringing back major victory to our school. And considering that no other sporting organization did nearly as well, I'd say that we led our school's name. We lost, but we won.

These were the best 25 moments of last year. Hopefully this year will bring more great moments than last year. May it be epic.

Michael Xavier Youd